| DEMENTIA |
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080225
updated 080319
the vanishing trickthere is a bit of repetition over here. the first section was published last time (080222) and is being included again for sake of continuity.
the british library in trivandrum is closing down i am told. or have they done so already? well it is of no moment to me; i had stopped going there months back though i had a valid membership till january 07, 2008. this is about an incident that took place about six months back.
as was my wont in those days i had dropped in at the library and as was the standard practice showed my membership card at the entrance. at that moment i noticed a german couple being told by the staff at the entrance that they could not go into the library as only members are allowed. i was wondering if i should intervene and tell the foreigners that they can approach the librarian and it is most unlikely he would have said no to the foreigners. then i thought better of it and decided that it will not be proper of me to meddle in other people's affairs. my attention was deviated a bit by this happening.
as i started walking towards the door of the library i just felt my pocket to ensure that my library membership card was there ; lucky that i did so - it was not there!
i turned around and the person who checks the membership card agreed that i had shown the card and that it was returned to me after noting down the membership number in the register. so the card has to be on my person. i turned all my pockets inside out. and searched thoroughly the only possessions i had with me, the books i had brought along for returning. the card could not be found. at that time i had not moved more than a couple of feet from the entrance and i searched the whole area; the card was not there.
the whole thing, the checking of the card by the staff member and the card going missing had all taken place in an area of one square meter and within less than five minutes. the only people in this space during that time was myself and two employees of the library - the one who checked the card and the security person; the germans were outside this domain. the card for all practical purposes had disappeared into thin air.
there was nothing i could do about it. luckily, for returning the books the membership card was not required and i went into the library and returned the books. i told the staff member there that my membership card was missing. i also told her that i am not going to request for a duplicate for i had a hunch that the card will come back to me - things were a bit too obvious even for my dull intellect!
and come back it did. the next time i visited the library the staff handed it over to me. i did not bother to ask them where they found it and who found it or any such thing. " appam thinnal mathi; kuzhi ennenta" that is the principle ( you dont worry about the number of air cavities inside the cake; just enjoy eating it).
this time i was not that lucky
that was on 080213 and it happened at the bank where i make most of my monetary transactions. i had driven in on my motorbike, parked it in the compound and had gone inside the bank for a couple of minutes. after that i had been to a shop within fifty meters from the spot to get photocopies of a letter. when i came back to the bike i realised that i did not have the key with me.
i went back to the bank, checked up the place i had been and the photocopying shop. it was not there in any of these places nor had anybody in these places seen the key.
i am sure i have not dropped the key anywhere. now a days i always carry a shoulder bag rather than depend on my trouser pockets which are all almost a decade old.
the most likely scenario is that i had left the key on the motorbike itself and the moment i turned my back it vanished into thin air.
the result was i wasted a whole day running around in circles. ultimately i had to leave the bike in the bank compound over night. the next day i purchased a new lock fitted it and brought the bike back home.
the fact of the matter
the fact of the matter is that i have the indian gestapo and his stooges trailing me wherever i go. they cultivate the people whom i have to deal with, prime them, instigate them, coax them to misbehave with me, create tension and if possible an altercation, so that the gestapo can step into the open and take over.
one of the main briefs of the agents is to deprive me of my personal belongings at the slightest possible opportunity and hand it over to the gestapo.
the black hole
i do forget things; i think most people do. but the problem comes up when the moment you turn your back your things end up in the black hole that is the gestapo's office!
it was not just like that my brief case disappeared minutes before i was to present a case in the court. and it was not just an accident that the presiding judge at the time of the hearing asked me if i had the case files with me! the gestapo must have informed the judge that my brief case and files are with them.
it is not just like that that my car key, original and duplicate, disappeared on successive days from where i had parked it at thakara parambu in thiruvananthapuram.
" looking after "
the basic idea behind the vanishing tricks is to cook up evidence to prove that i am forgetful and thereby substantiate the hypothesis that i am demented and an imbecile. the highly intelligent indian gestapo then can keep on "looking after" me and have a ball.
now a days i seldom move out of my rented house , the main aim being to cut short gasoline consumption. the most fashionable thing would have been to say that it is to reduce carbon emission! well my reason is very simple - to save money so that i can live within my means, that is on my humble pension. british library was one place i used to frequent after i retired and within no time the gestapo had a large presence there - a whole flock of pbirds and a battalion of hired thugs.
now that i have stopped going to the library, the racket there must have been moved to the state bank area. the missing bike key i take as a warning. the gestapo must have stepped up his activity in that set up. and indeed of late i have been noticing a change in the attitude of some of the staff. earlier i had forgotten my key bunch in the bank once and when i returned and asked them the staff had readily handed it back to me. that need not be the attitude any more and it could directly end up in the gestapo's custody never to be seen by me again.
yes, i do forget things
i do forget things; it is a fact and i cannot help it. like what happened in the british library itself on another occasion.
back home from the city, i found out that i did not have the house key with me; i had left it on a table in the library. i was locked out and per force, had to get the key back. the alternatives were either break the lock of the house or spend the night in a hotel room and next morning when the library opens, pick up the key from where i had left it - provided it was still there!
i rushed back but the library was closed by then. luckily the security chap on duty was a new comer who had not been primed about me! he telephoned one of the staff members who took the trouble of coming back and opening the library and i picked up the key exactly from where i had left it. i was very lucky that nobody had picked it up.
i thanked the people and apologized profusely for i really felt bad that some one had to be called back from home after office hours, all due to a lapse on my part. ( in fact i met the library manager the next day to find out if there was any way of compensating; there were none). as i walked out with my keys, i could see the staff member giving the security chap a dressing down. the next time as i walked in to the library this particular security person was on duty; and the fellow who was so nice to me that night showed that gestapo model "welcome" sign like the others at the entrance were in the habit of giving me. could be that the fellow was following orders from his masters. (the security chaps are not regular employees of the british library and are on contract from a local company). i was very much aware that i was not welcome there; but i was also aware that it was not that easy for them to turn me out.
white magic
and there were people, who used to take things sportingly. like the nursing students of an establishment where i had worked for a few months in 1980. i used to leave my things all over the place. the girls gradually realised that this was an incurable condition and used to pick up my things and keep it in safe custody with them. the next time i need my "tools" and start fumbling the little magicians will produce it from their pockets and all of them will have a nice laugh at my expense.
the problem i am facing now is, that the moment i turn my back, my things get sucked into the black hole.
sami thattikko
why was it that the external examiner in medicine in the late seventies was telling a candidate that digitalis is a "vegetable" drug?
the gentleman ( was a tamilian and as a general rule, tamilians are not crooks - i will not say that about the trivandrumites ) was taking pity on the poor young man who according to his fellow professionals from trivandrum was already in cardiac failure - one of the tertiary complications of some thing he has acquired by his own "hard labour". ("he must be a regular poacher!" - that was the main school of thought ! )
the stalwarts had declared the fellow a "mandabudhi" (demented) way back in the mid seventies - the result of the other tertiary complication. and they never made a secret of it. history is being repeated ditto more than thirty years later.
people usually take for granted that the "poacher" is a "vegetarian" and the good natured tamilian ( he of course knows that there are no foxglove farms) was only trying to be nice and suggesting that the poacher should not have any religious scruples coming in the way of his swallowing the pills which his condition warrants.
as far as my information goes the life expectancy of some one already in failure (except when the causative factor can be treated) is just five years even today, leave alone the seventies. shall i try pinching myself?
viceman
080225
updated 080319
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